I will start with a short poem to try and lead you into where I am coming from, it is not amazing and probably could be better but they are my feelings right now....
Nothing to All, All to Nothing,
In emptiness and limbo I'm the odd one out;
Dreams have grown now all been snatched,
How many times do I do this - My life.
It's not the first, Or maybe it is?
I haven't had happiness, dreams before;
They say it's not win or lose - It's a draw,
But where in my heart can I find this level.
Day to Day, Night to Night,
Routine and plans have left me now;
So I'm in nowhere waiting for something -
Nothing to All, All to Nothing.
So there we go, that is something of how I am feeling, It is over a man who is very special and I can not find anything bad to say about him! Maybe if I could it would be easier I don't know?
He has nothing bad to say about me yet we have parted and neither of us know if it is forever! He is suffering , is so confused and I have been helping him but yesterday he ended up in hospital with pains in his chest and now he has been told I have to go and he needs space, he still has his ex wife whom he is good friends with to help him, not living there or anything like that and I have packed up most of my stuff and gone, on the verge of homelessness to give him that space because I love him but it is killing me slowly the not knowing.
Well I am going to cry in a minute so I will stop for a bit but I will be back!
